Top 30 quotes of jack handey famous quotes and sayings. He is best known for deep thoughts by jack handey, which appeared on saturday night live. Dec 14, 2010 the smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. Check out our full interview with the comedians comedian. A national bestselling collection of comedian jack handeys deep thoughts short, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on.
Jack handey born february 25, 1949 is an american humorist. Discover and share deep thoughts by jack handey quotes. He cried and cried, but i think that deep down he thought it. Jack handy it takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man. The legendary deep thoughts and new yorker humorist jack handey is back with his very first novela hilarious, absurd, farflung adventure tale. Relaxing music played over pastoral scenes, increasing the feeling that you were watching a very zen relaxation. Thanks to jack handey for being a comedic genius and coming up with these. The title says it all this book is simply a collection of deep thoughts from the mind of jack handey, an emmy awardwinner and coproducer of saturday night live, where these thoughts first appeared. Deep thought was a supernaturalcomputer programmed to calculate the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything. Below are some of his observations i thought youd like. Lucky for you, we have absolutely no intention of answering your questions.
Best deep thoughts by jack handey pattericos pontifications. Although many people assume otherwise, handey is a real person, not a pen name or character. A national bestselling collection of comedian jack handeys deep thoughtsshort, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on. Deep thoughts by jack handey, a segment on saturday night live consisting of oneliner jokes written and orated by jack handey. Deep thoughts on personal productivity by jack handey the. Deep thoughts by jack handey instead of trying to build newer. Deep thoughts by jack handey if a kid asks where rain comes from, i think a cute thing to tell him is, god is crying. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, forget em, cause, man, theyre gone. The sequel to deep thoughts, this collection of humorous meditations contains inspirational lunacy from the saturday night live regular. At the bottom youll find links to his the new yorker short stories. One thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. When gary told me he had found jesus, i thought, yahoo. His humor pieces have appeare in the new yorker, outside, playboy, national lampoon, punch, and other publications. The recitation section spreadsheets with our record of your scores for course assignments will.
For instance, i was going to take my nephew to disneyland, but instead i drove him to an old burnedout warehouse. Watch saturday night live highlight deep thoughts by jack handey on. A unique collection of handeys deep thoughtsirreverent observations on life as seen on saturday night live. Deep thoughts by jack handey if you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, letem go, because, man, theyre gone. As i bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable until i realised it wasnt a nectarine at all, but a. Deep thoughts by jack handy instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, mankind should be thinking about getting more use. And if you love jack handey quotes, check out runt of the webs other posts on funny quotes and the funniest louis ck quotes. Thoughts, by jack handeyon satur day night live, the show for. Sometimes i worry what kind of a world we are leaving to the bands of roving mutants who will inherit it. Jack handey is the author of the bestselling deep thoughts series of books.
Lec17a deep thoughts by jack handey instead of trying to. Renowned humorist and former saturday night live writer jack handey speaks out against expanded cougar trapping. I wish there was something called trial by ants, because at the end the guy would say, the ants have spoken. One thing i always felt bad about was kicking grandma in the head.
This extended segment contains a joke some might consider. Deep thoughts by jack handey if you drop your keys into molten lava just let em go cause, man, theyre gone. Im sure there was some great satire about the election of 1920, if that was an election year, but i just prefer. He and mike sacks remember this fuzzy memory together. If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down.
Lift your spirits with funny jokes, trending memes, entertaining gifs. Brings back memories of deep thoughts by jack handey. I recently discovered that these were not the usual anonymous or nearly so jokes that circulate on the net, but were and taken from jack handeys books. Deep thoughts by handey, jack, 1949publication date 1992 topics wit and humor, juvenile, american wit and humor. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. Deep thoughts by jack handey some time back i received by email a collection of deep thoughts by jack handey and put them on this page.
New mexicans are rallying against cruel wildlife management. Aug 11, 2015 new mexicans are rallying against cruel wildlife management. Deep thoughts from jack handey to me, boxing is like a ballet, except theres no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. Dont ever get your speedometer confused with your clock, like i did once, because the faster you go the later you think you are. Deep thoughts unique classroom decor posters not jack. And if he asks why god is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, probably because of something you did. Please stop the deep thoughts book deep thoughts by jack handey. Phils favorite jack handy quotations if you ever drop your keys in a river of molten lava, let em go, because, man, theyre gone. If i ever get real rich, i hope im not real mean to poor people, like i am now. Note that these are not jack handey deep thoughts, which are ed material. Deep thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine army man. He cried and cried, but i think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. Please stop the deep thoughts book deep thoughts by jack.
Deep thoughts jack handey full interview cbc radio. We do however want to celebrate the fine work of the distinguished saturday night live writer with this gallery of the thirtyfour. Click download or read online button to get the stench of honolulu book now. His musings attracted steve martin in the late 70s early 80s and after being introduced to lorne michaels, jack became a contributing writer on saturday night live for the better part of 2 decades. He lives in santa fe, nm, with his wife, dog, and cats. Its a neat trick to plan an elaborate trick on the first of april and then say april fools. Nov 03, 2016 if you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, letem go. By kelly conaboy september 22, 2017 thats why you like reading benchley and thurber and stuff like that. A national bestselling collection of comedian jack handeys deep thoughtsshort, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on saturday night live. Deep thoughts by jack handey was an icon of saturday night live in the s. Deep thoughts by jack handy instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, mankind should be thinking about getting more use out of the weapons we already have. Lec17a deep thoughts by jack handey instead of trying. His other books include the stench of honolulu, what id say to the martians, deeper thoughts, all new, and deepest thoughts. Deep thought, a chatterbot made to work over irc, named after the hitchhikers guide deep thought.
If you drop your keys into molten lava just let em go cause, man, theyre gone. Handys absurdist humor touched my funnybone, and my funnybone is a queer little fella. Deep thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine army man comics edited by george meyer and continued in national lampoon in 1984 though gained popularity when they were read on saturday night live beginning in 1991. Buy a cheap copy of deep thoughts book by jack handey. He is best known for his deep thoughts by jack handey, a large body of surrealistic oneliner jokes, as well as his fuzzy memories and my big thick novel shorts, and for his deadpan delivery. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. It takes odd observations, as seen below, to set me to tittering. But what was her head doing right by the football like that. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Handy and his deep thoughts collections got what i need. We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason. What are the best deep thoughts by jack handey, in pattericos opinion. Check out all the channels below and see what their jokes for today are, too.
What are the best deep thoughts by jack handey jokes. The stench of honololu are you a fan of books in which famous tourist destinations are repurposed as unlivable hellholes for no particular reason. Handley page bomber build the handleypage bomber trail blazers of. I just received my shipment of his deep thoughts books business expense, and i discovered his wisdom around personal productivity, and life in general. From an actual newspaper contest where entrants age 4 to 15 were asked to imitate deep thoughts by jack handey. Saturday night live used to include these very short bits in between their comedy sketches. And i can picture us attacking that world, because theyd never expect it. Aug 12, 2005 what are the best deep thoughts by jack handey, in pattericos opinion. He was a staff writer for saturday night live, and has won two emmy awards and a writers guild of america award. To see what your friends thought of this quote, please. Now jack handey has written a novel, the stench of. Therefore the divide and rule by not just two but dozens of groups and. Random thoughts for those who enjoy saturday night live.
Deep thoughts by jack handey really funny clean jokes. Cooking up some of the most outrageous scenarios you might ever readhear, handey is a surrealist comic. They didnt really write about, you know, the election of 1920, which is gone. Originally, the deep thoughts bits featured the voice of phil hartman rip in the introduction, then jack handey, real guy, would read the surprising, iconic, and always hilarious statements. The stench, isbn 9781455522385 buy the the stench of honolulu. Deep thoughts by jack handey one thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. It designed the planet earth, which was built by the magratheans. Once when i was in hawaii, on the island of kauai, i met a mysterious old stranger. Please practice handwashing and social distancing, and check. Wed eat some stuff, or not, and then i think we went home. He is most famous for his deep thoughts, a large corpus of surrealistic oneliner jokes. Deep thoughts on personal productivity by jack handey. His other books include the stench of honolulu, what id say to. May 14, 2018 saturday night live used to include these very short bits in between their comedy sketches.
This site is like a library, use search box in the widget to get ebook that you want. Open up a new tab with a wonderful and inspiring quote from philosopher jack handey. A unique collection of handey s deep thoughts irreverent observations on life as seen on saturday night live. Sep 22, 2017 its a nice interview that will make you upset that jack handey doesnt have a nobel prize or at least more money than he has currently. There was a time when deep thoughts by jack handy was the only part of snls hour and a half that made me laugh.
If a kid asks where rain comes from, i think a cute thing to tell him. Fans of saturday night live may associate the author with deep thoughts, the subversive. With quirky, offbeat humor that often veers into the unexpected, jack handeys witty one liners make this book the perfect funny gift for fans of mitch hedberg or for anyone who appreciates a good dad. To me, its a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk. Deep thoughts by jack handey instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, we should be. Two programmers named lunkwill and fook were chosen to propose the ultimate question to deep thought on the day of the great onturning. He is best known for his deep thoughts by jack handey, a large body of surrealistic oneliner. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, letem go. Deep thoughts by jack handey the philosophunculist.
You may be wondering who is jack handey and is he an infomercial product. See more ideas about deep thoughts, thoughts and deep thoughts jack handy. The 75 most hilarious homer simpson quotes of all time. Discover the magic of the internet at imgur, a community powered entertainment destination. Whenever i see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. May 24, 2019 the name jack handey may resonate with you. Deepish thoughts jp sartre cookbook tables turned poor wording accident reports men and women. The stench of honolulu download ebook pdf, epub, tuebl, mobi. Of all my imaginary friends, i dont think there was one that i didnt end up having to kill.